Upon receiving the news that he has been suspended for 7 games, Lakers' forward Metta World Peace, also known as Ron Artest, has decided to take initiative, unloading a round of bullets into James Harden's general vicinity in an attempt to apologize to the Thunder's celebrated sixth man.
Though this may come as shocking news, one must be reminded of the nature of Metta's celebrations in order to understand how an apology could have gone so terribly wrong.
Immediately following Metta's apology the embattled basketball player rushed over to police to argue for the inadvertency of his actions. "I was in the heat of the moment, apologizing with all my heart, and all of a sudden I hear sirens and I'm just thinking like, 'oh no, not again, what did I do this time?' "
Along with critically injuring two civilians, Metta's careless apology grazed the thigh of James Harden. Harden, a key component to his team's success, is still recovering from the concussion he received on the wrong end of Metta's thoughtless celebration and is now pleading for World Peace to bring an end to the suffering.
"I just need it to stop," said Harden in a statement issued from an undisclosed location. "Stop celebrating, stop apologizing, stop getting into fistfights with Detroit, just please, Ron, stop."
Police are awaiting Artest's next round of strange, slightly remorseful round of tweets to determine whether or not to make an arrest for the errant apology.