Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Chris Cooley and His Urine

Chris Cooley is quickly becoming my favorite player in the NFL. (Considering I don't like anyone on the Bears, that's less of a compliment, but oh well.)

A few weeks ago we noted that the Redskins tight end has achieved elite status among professional athletes blogging with his detailed answer to who would win a tag team wrestling match pitting him and his girlfriend against Romo-Jessica.

Cooley not only has his own blog, but now occasionally writes for Yahoo!Sports NFL blog Shutdown Corner.

His latest entry will make you pee your pants. Here's his priceless lede:

How do I end up in a bathroom stall at the Borgata with my pants around my ankles while a man named Bill stares at my penis?

Yep, an entire blog post about his urine sample and some details into the NFL drug testing procedure. I don't want to leak too much of what he had to say, but I'll leave you with this:

"Not many words were said in the stall. Both of us were completely comfortable with the procedure. Bill took out the package, but I was the one who had to break the seal. I ripped open the plastic container, revealing a short plastic cup to capture my random urine sample.

I had known Bill was going to show up around four in the afternoon, so I was well prepared. After drinking five or six cranberry juices I couldn't wait to go, but I figured that was a good thing. I couldn't risk having stage fright in that type of situation. I mean, what would I have done? Chat it up with Bill over a couple of beers while he stared at my junk?"

Good stuff. Seriously, if for some reason, some extremely viable reason, the benefits of sports blogging surpassed those of professional football players, Cooley would have himself a hell of a career if he was so inclined.

The Cooley Zone: Adventures in NFL drug testing [Shutdown Corner]