Hilarious Last Names On Pro Sports Uniforms

Chad Ocho Cinco Still Has Nothing On He Hate Me

5/15/09 in NFL   |   100%InjuryRate   |   1283 respect

It took a long time, but the NFL has finally been forced to recognize that Chad Johnson is indeed now Chad Ocho Cinco. Naturally, the NFL had to have the last laugh in this case, as the jersey will actually say "OCHOCINCO" with no space since Johnson technically had his name changed to Chad Javon Ochocinco last August in Florida.

"It's his legal name," AFC information manager Corry Rush said Thursday.

Man I wish I could have heard Rush say that in person. Even through the writing, he sounds utterly thrilled.

Anyway, with the arrival of Ochocinco this year, we thought we'd take a look a look back at some of the most entertaining last names on jerseys over the years. And just for good measure, we also have some of the best last name jersey combinations as well.

So, let's get to it:


Rod Smart: You could make the argument that the former XFLer and Carolina Panther is who started Chad's bizarre fascination with changing his last name. Smart's jersey became recognized across the sports world almost immediately and even caused several XFL players to change their jersey to "I Hate He" and "I Hate He Too."



Dean Windass: Longtime soccer player who currently plays for Premiership club Hull City. Definitely has one of the best last names ever.



Gregor Fucka: European basketball big man. Can't even imagine the chants during during away games.



Clayton Stoner:
Currently an enforcer with the Minnesota Wild, which is a somehwhat odd designation given his last name.




Rusty Kuntz: Former big league player, currently a first base coach with the Royals. You knew he'd be on his list.



Miroslav Satan:
Currently with the Pittsburgh Penguins, it's a shame this guy never played for the Devils. He even looks a lot like Satan too. Not to mention his Yahoo! player page ends in 666.



Bartolo Colon: Had to have at least one Colon on this list.



Danny Shittu: Naturally we'll follow Colon up with this Premier League and Nigerian national player Shittu.
 


Antonio Bastardo: Current Phillies farmhand. Have a feeling if he ever makes the bigs, his jersey will sell like hotcakes in Philly.



JJ Putz: Has pitched like one since joining the Mets.



Todd Weiner:
Atlanta Falcons offensive tackle who protects the QB from getting jammed on his blind side.

And now for some of the best jersey combinations of all time:


If you're not sure what it means, just check Urban Dictionary.
 



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5/19/09   |   Aceraison   |   183 respect

He's a little side note to "He Hate Me".  He wanted his jersey to say "They Hate Me" but the XFL told him it was too long.

5/18/09   |   bperin

LMAO! OMG! This was the best one yet, keep them coming! (No Pun Intended)

5/17/09   |   Seachickenhawk

sixtorivera wrote:
the guy sitting next to dingle-berry is dykes.....ever see 2 girls and a cup and you'll know what i mean.

Dude, that's just gross...thanks for the memories. 

5/17/09   |   sixtorivera

the guy sitting next to dingle-berry is dykes.....ever see 2 girls and a cup and you'll know what i mean.

5/15/09   |   Brendanc8504

have you ever heard the legend of Rusty Kuntz?

5/15/09   |   derms33   |   17653 respect

What about that Charger jersey that said "LEAF" on the back?  hilarious

5/15/09   |   gzambo   |   4 respect

Seachickenhawk wrote:


Don't forget Newcastle United player, Nicky Butt.

When he does a header do they call him "Head Butt"?

5/15/09   |   beeze_bee

What a laugh. When you need it just look here.

5/15/09   |   spankyc14   |   14 respect

Don't forget Peter Vagenas of the Seattle Sounders FC of the MLS.  I'm not sure how you're supposed to say that name, but as far as I'm concerned there's only one correct pronounciation.

5/15/09   |   BearcatFan   |   6 respect

That may even be my pirated picture of the "Dingle-Berry" guys.  They are wearing away colors.  When WVA was playing at Nippert, they were sitting next to each other.  I have seats 12th row up, 50 yard line, and snapped a picture identical to that. 

5/15/09   |   Seachickenhawk



Don't forget Newcastle United player, Nicky Butt.

5/15/09   |   Brendanc8504

WhoDat12 wrote:
I agree. But I had difficulty ordering a Randall Gay jersey when he was with New England. My friends and I had to call the number to clarify we weren't trying to be derogatory, just trying to support someone we know.

I understand, so what do you think the NFL would do if he had his name changed to penis sucker. haha, would they allow it?

5/15/09   |   WhoDat12   |   2252 respect

Brendanc8504 wrote:
they let the fans order jersey's that say b#tch and ho, so I dont see any reason why theplayers shouldnt be able to put whatever they want

I agree. But I had difficulty ordering a Randall Gay jersey when he was with New England. My friends and I had to call the number to clarify we weren't trying to be derogatory, just trying to support someone we know.

5/15/09   |   djjfrench   |   67 respect

 That is a fantastic collection of pictures.  Bt they HAVE to do it cause it's that damn fools government name!

5/15/09   |   Brendanc8504

they let the fans order jersey's that say b#tch and ho, so I dont see any reason why theplayers shouldnt be able to put whatever they want

5/15/09   |   Keeter   |   92 respect

Lastly, though he never made the team (I don't think), about 20 years ago in pre-season camp the Cleveland Browns had someone on their team named 'Square'.     They played the Bears in the Hall of Fame preseason opener at Canton, OH.    I'm at the game with a bunch of college buddies, and we start yelling at this guy.     He sat on the bench right in front of us, the entire game, all clean and his helmet still on, and we're all over him !!

Then, in the 4th quarter he finally gets pi$$ed at us, finally takes off his helmet, stands up on the bench and looks back at us like he's gonna go OJ on us.     He turns back around to face the field, and his big ol' Afro is in the perfect shape of (you guessed it) A SQUARE !!!

To which.........we start laying into him some more !!

We started a chant to the Cleveland coach, referencing an old John Lennon song..........

"All we are saying..............is give Square a chance !!!!!!!!!"
"All we are saying..............is give Square a chance !!!!!!!!!"
"All we are saying..............is give Square a chance !!!!!!!!!"


(over & over again)

5/15/09   |     |   9 respect

if i  was gregor i would change my middle name badmotha

5/15/09   |   Keeter   |   92 respect

And, while they missed each other by a few years, the Cubs had pitcher Bills Hands and catcher Barry Foote on their teams in the 70's.......what a "battery" that would've made !!

Hands & Foote !!!

5/15/09   |   Keeter   |   92 respect

The 1992 Chicago Bears had the following linebackers:

Ron Cox
Jim Schwantz

I wish I had a picture of the 2 of them standing next to each other !!!!!!!!!!!

5/15/09   |   SwaGGa_Like_Ice

Gotta Love It!!! Hilarious Man!

5/15/09   |   skaterj19

skaterj19 wrote:
You making fun of chad ? Don't hate on him appreciate !!!

But some of those last names are funny!!!!

5/15/09   |   skaterj19

You making fun of chad ? Don't hate on him appreciate !!!

5/15/09   |   keppieboy   |   158 respect

 Thats some funny shiiii