It's true, folks, college football is just a week away and with the start of games comes a more intensive period of recruiting.
Thanks to I Want My BTN, we've found this hilarious Big Ten Network commercial featuring all of the coaches selling you on their school.
The usual stuff: Jim Tressell offers you an opportunity to lose in the BCS title game, Ron Zook would like you to come water skiing with him *wink* *wink* *nudge* *nudge*, Rich Rodriguez has the best snake oil around, and then there's Joe Paterno.
Just watch until the very end and you'll either be frightened, or keeled over. JoePa would really like you to come to Penn State, but I'm afraid it was at the risk of leaving a little something extra in his pants.