NFL

Jon Kitna's Concussion Healed by 'Hand of God.' Roger Goodell to Investigate Immediately

9/17/07 in NFL   |   CriticalFanatic   |   respect

I would have never considered God to be much of a Lions fan. It's doubtful He'd put a team under the watchful eye of Matt Millen, but you never know.

But it turns out God was dropped by Ford Fieldhouse Sunday and healed Jon Kitna just in time to pull out a win.

"I've never felt anything like that, and for it to clear up and go right back to as normal as I can be, is nothing short of a miracle," Kitna said Monday. "I just definitely feel the hand of God. That's all it was. You can't explain it.


"I have no headaches, no symptoms, no lingering effects. But that was the worst my head has ever felt, and the worse my memory was in the second quarter. Yet, after halftime there was nothing."

Roger Goodell has launched an immediate investigation into possible cheating by Jon Kitna and the Detroit Lions. The NFL simply cannot allow God to be helping out Kitna, when he needs to devote equal time to the Bengals defense.

Kitna: I returned from concussion due to 'miracle' (ESPN)
Notify me by email about comments that follow mine. Preview

9/17/07   |   Nick S

The Lions doctor's are CHEATERS. Forget Belichick, this is the newest scandal!

9/17/07   |   Flea_jm14

If you ask Viking fans, it was the work of someone else.

9/17/07   |   kantwistaye   |   4214 respect

(Edited by kantwistaye)

In related news, Bill Belichick regrets selling his soul to the devil; hopes God doesn't interfere in anymore games.