Ok, so we’re in the middle of the summer, and despite all of our love for America’s greatest pastime, we could use a change of pace, something a little extra in the sports world.
If it were to actually happen, the intensity would be lower even than that of the pro-bowl, but let’s take a step out of our logistical minds for a second:
We’ll say that LeBron’s Heat lose out on the Championship race this season, then out of seemingly nowhere, former Colt Pierre Garcon tweets that LeBron is too soft to win an NBA championship. LeBron’s manhood is suddenly thrown into question and he feels compelled to prove his stripes. LeBron claims that the 2011 Colts were so bad that he could wrangle up a group of friends that would take Indy to the house in their own game.
Fellow NBA players who had also resented the stereotype that NBA players are “too weak” or “complain too much” see an opportunity to turn this stigma around. In result, we are given a heated battle between the NBA’s best and the NFL’s worst, and out of nowhere, LeBron and crew ask yours truly to field the team – imagine that! Well boys, here’s the squad we’re walking onto the field with. Not your conventional football roster, but I think we could make some magic happen:
So our offense is based around athletic ability and height more than anything else. We know we can field a much taller team than the Colts, but we won’t have the same type of weight distribution. The playbook is going to mostly consist of plays where we can get one of our more speedy threats out in the open or plays where we can toss up a jump ball where we have a favorable size matchup. Here’s how we’re lining up:
QB – CHRIS PAUL
Whether it’s football, baseball, basketball or hell, even beach volleyball, it’s never a bad thing for Chris Paul to have the ball in his hands. I know there aren’t too many quarterbacks in the league that are six-feet-flat anymore, but I think what CP3 lacks in height he makes up for in just about every other department. He’s the NBA’s best decision maker, cool under pressure, and always makes his teammates better. Granted we’ve only seen him do this on a basketball court, but I bet Paul’s precision passing would translate rather well to the quarterback position. He’s such an intelligent athlete that I trust he’ll keep the turnovers down and give his team the best shot to win – and watch for him to run when the opportunity presents itself.
Other players considered for the job were Derrick Rose and Kevin Love. The latter may sound a bit ridiculous, but at 6’10”, Love would be able to see the entire field and we’ve witnessed how effortlessly he can toss a basketball the length of the court. Rose on the other hand would be a run-first QB primarily, but his height advantage over Paul makes him an enticing option.
RB – TY LAWSON
A tough position to consider with few NBA players having the ideal RB size, but we’re going to have him hit the weights pretty hard in the weeks leading up to the game. One of the league’s quickest players, Lawson is sturdier than most other really quick NBA point guards like Stephon Curry, Monta Ellis, or Rajon Rondo. He’s about the same size as Jahvid Best, an elusive running back rather than a bulldozer. We’re going to use him mostly on screens out in the flat, as he wouldn’t be the ideal short-yardage, cram-it-down-your-throat type of back, no. Our running game is more finesse.
Outside Receivers – DERRICK ROSE and KYRIE IRVING
Almost identical frames (about 6’3”, 190) Rose and Irving will be a tough combo for the Colts cornerbacks to stop. Like Lawson, they’ll have to pack on a bit more weight, but with their jumping abilities and speed, these athletic novelties can really burn you. Irving is a smart and humble player that I could see being something of a blend between Marvin Harrison and Hines Ward – obviously not nearly as good as either, but a nice combination of both. Reliable but not too flashy, Irving understands the holes in an NBA defense and with a little tape watching, I think we could get him to read the Indy D well. Rose is more of an X-factor. He can make those highlight reel catches and really propel the team, but isn’t the most consistent target, maybe like a Vincent Jackson (obviously a bit smaller, though).
But on short yardage and goal-line plays, we’re dipping into the bench and bringing in Blake Griffin and Dwight Howard to play some jump-ball with the Colts secondary. I like our chances there.
Also considered the 6’6” Tyreke Evans and the high-flying Russell Westbrook here.