Nationals Fail Again, This Time With Sausage Shooting Mascot
MLB

In Case You Were Looking For One More Thing The Nationals Can't Do Right, Add "Sausage Shooting" To The List.

5/20/09 in MLB   |   Pat   |   5229 respect

It's amazing how much one MLB franchise can fail in one year. Let's take a look at the Nationals so far this year:

1) They just can't win games.
2) They can't spell their own team name right.
3) They need help from fans putting the tarp on the field.
4) They can't spell their players' names right.
5) They fail miserably at shooting sausages into the stands.

Wait, what's that last one? You mean you haven't heard about it yet? Well, prepare to give yourself the old facepalm once again, at the expense of the Washington Natinals.

The latest and greatest in the long string of failure that is the Washington Nationals is SausageGate 2009, in which they attempt to shoot sausages, wrapped up in t-shirts, into the stands, using a small cannon.

Not surprisingly, this doesn't go as planned. It looks like the wieners couldn't handle being shot out of a cannon like that, and fell apart, raining down chunks of sausage and buns all over the field and the fans.

Here's a description from Alex Zeese, who was at the game:

"Every time you would see one fire, you would almost see shotgun pellets of stuff come out of it, stuff would explode everywhere. A guy in front of me caught one, he opens it up, the whole thing was just crushed, and the sausage casing was pretty much the only thing left. It had been torn down the center, all you saw was little bits of meat stuck to the casing. It was basically gutted. I don't think anyone would eat that. I'm just glad there was no mustard in that stuff."

Wow. Just when you thought the Nationals couldn't outdo themselves, they have once again found a way. It was described by others as "confetti", and "raining bread". Way to go, Natinals. This will go down as a monumental year in baseball history, with the most fail-filled franchise of all time. Congrats!


They Can't Shoot Sausage, Can They? [Washington Post]
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5/22/09   |   launcherguy

The Nationals and Screech mascot need to take a lesson from the Phanatic and Hatfield, the makers of the Phanatics unbelievable hot dog launcher...this thing was done right...watch the video...  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aW-ljrm7a6g

5/21/09   |   kwheels

ive said this once,and ill say it again,u can mock tha nats all u want,but u cant do any worse than last years lions.

5/21/09   |   MarkTheShark   |   590 respect

mk_donley wrote:
Sausage shooting!.......Hilarious....... This definitely beats 10 cent beer night at old Cleveland Munincipal Stadium in 1976! Anybody remember that? Big mistake!

I think I might do a story for the 35th anniversary of that ill-fated night in Cleveland.

5/20/09   |   gobigblue1960   |   4803 respect

"...as God is my witness, i thought Turkey's could fly."

5/20/09   |   akecke   |   5 respect

Being one of the few Nationals fans, I feel obligated to post this on any article bashing my team.

Making fun of the Nats is like pistol-whipping a blind kid.

That is all.

5/20/09   |   100%InjuryRate   |   1283 respect

Also, in response to this whole post:

THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!

5/20/09   |   100%InjuryRate   |   1283 respect

mk_donley wrote:
Sausage shooting!.......Hilarious....... This definitely beats 10 cent beer night at old Cleveland Munincipal Stadium in 1976! Anybody remember that? Big mistake!

Yes sir. Both teams had to use their bats to threaten drunken crazies. What a night.

5/20/09   |   mk_donley   |   2554 respect

Sausage shooting!.......Hilarious....... This definitely beats 10 cent beer night at old Cleveland Munincipal Stadium in 1976! Anybody remember that? Big mistake!

5/20/09   |   drn0iswatr   |   731 respect

 isn't that what Lorena Bobbitt did? Or was that sausage chopping?

5/20/09   |   boomerpro

Haha, it's the curse of "Les'Expo" !!!!  Should never have moved from Montreal. They were a real team there!

5/20/09   |   yanksawboy   |   8 respect

 I guess in order for them to sell tickets they will have to be a cent. Also I think I'm going to Yanks Nat game at the Stadium I can't wait until they beat them by a twenty runs and sweep them so miserably!

5/20/09   |   keppieboy   |   158 respect

 I think there is a little too much sausage shooting going on in there front office.

5/20/09   |   WhoDat12   |   2252 respect

Wow. When I read the headline (sausage shooting), I didn't quite know what to expect. I am now relieved and for some reason slightly frightened.