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4/18/08
Nothing Says Tasty Ballpark Goodness Like Turkey Testicles
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I know it's tough out there for independent minor league teams. You constantly have to find new ways to impress and entertain fans while still creating cash flow to keep the team from folding. But this, my friends, is not how to do that.

Here's a new concession treat the Sioux Falls Canaries will soon be offering:

"The Sioux Falls Canaries and Dakota Provisions are teaming up this summer to bring Fowl Balls to concession stands at the Birdcage. The venture makes Sioux Falls Stadium the first sports venue in the country to offer their fans a chance to enjoy turkey testicles."

That sounds, uh, horrible beyond belief. By the way, Fowl Balls may also be one of the worst names ever for a testicle-related product. I mean, if you've already gone that far, why not just totally go for it. How about Big Honkin' Turkey Sacks, or Turkey Groins du Jour.  Although honestly, I think any name would be awful for a turkey testicle product.

The director of food and beverage for the team also said that fans can dip their breaded and fried "fowl balls" in a variety of sauces including ranch, barbecue and bleu cheese.

Well that changes everything. If I can dip turkey balls into barbecue sauce then bring 'em on! I could eat dried cement if you threw barbecue sauce on it. Although both will definitely cause me to throw up.

[Sports Biz via SbB]
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