People, there will be no NFL football for the next four months. Dumb and inconsequential off-field stories like this are all we have to subsist upon until September.
So with no further comment, let's take a look at the strange and occasionally amusing job offers which have been made to Tebow in the last 24 hours:
- The Lingerie Football League - These days they call themselves the Legends Football League because obviously they're very concerned about coming across as sexist. But the LFL offered Tebow a job as their national Quarterbacks Coach in a two-sentence offer letter that made no mention of what this position would entail or how the job would be performed.
- Omaha Beef - Not to be confused with Omaha Steaks, those delicious steaks in a box at the back of you freezer, the Omaha Beef are an indoor football team in some low-rent indoor league that makes Arena Football look like the English Premier League. The Omaha Beef have offered Tebow their starting quarterback job, with a pay rate of $75 per game. For Tebow, this would represent a 99.99943% pay cut.
- Montreal Alouettes - Je te plumerai! The Alouettes actually hold Tebow's Canadian Football League rights, so if Tebow heads to the Great White North then Montreal is likely where he'd play. Since Tebow's release from the Jets, the Alouettes' general manager has indicated Tebow would come in a reserve -- not a starter -- should he play for Montreal. "If he wants to come to Canada, he would be in the same situation as the one he was in with New York," Alouettes GM Jim Popp told NFL.com. "He can come here and compete to be the backup to Anthony Calvillo and learn the game, just like Jeff Garcia did (behind Doug Flutie)."