Unless you've been hiding under a rock for the past day, then you probably know that Shaq is about to be traded to the Phoenix Suns. The trade, in reality, doesn't seem to make a lot of sense. Why would you add a slow-moving and injured giant to a fast-paced small ball team? I don't know, but it's certainly helped us during this slow week. I owe you a beer, Phoenix Suns.

Naturally, the reaction to the potential trade has not been positive. Here are some peoples thoughts on the trade from around the interwebs.

• "This is the worst trade I have ever heard of in my life."
• "If Suns pull off this trade, this means three former Bulls players would be ruining three franchises (Kerr, Paxson and MJ)."
• SHAQ IS THE LAZIEST ATHLETE OF ALL TIME!!
• besides the heat, the only people that stand to benefit from this trade are the Phoenix area custom suit tailors
• "No me gusta."

But all these people need to realize that Shaq isn't just coming to Phoenix to play basketball, he's coming to enlighten the city. Shaq's a Renaissance man who has many other talents besides playing basketball that he'll bring with him. Let's look at what Shaq is besides just a broken down basketball player. He's a break dancer.


A video game character.


A thespian.


A horrible rapper.


Professional glass breaker.


Insult champion.


Professional Jackass personality.


Quote machine.

So see, you're getting an awful lot with Shaq, Phoenix. Maybe not a great player, but at least he'll be entertaining.