Why Some Men have dogs and not wives...

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Why Some Men have dogs and not wives...

Why Some Men have Dogs and not Wives:

1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.

2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.

3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.

4. A dog's parents never visit.

5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.

6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day.

7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.


8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?"

10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.


11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.

12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad.. They just think it's interesting.

13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.

And last, but not least:

14. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.

| Closed on 11/19/09 at 05:00PM
FanIQ Pts? No | Locker Room | Multiple Choice Opinion Poll

34 Fans
53%	a. This
15%	b. That
35%	c. Other/Comment

	&nbp;
TOP COMMENT
#6 \| 33 days ago 18packabs (+)	The DOG Listens....... and wears NO shoes and has no *credit cards* This
	25

49 Comments | Sorted by Most Recent First | Red = You Disagreed

Vote for your favorite comments. Fans decide the Top Comment (3+ votes) and also hide poor quality comments (4+ votes).

#1 | 33 days ago

Den-ace (+)

I think you covered all the bases! The studded collar one #11 was my favorite though!

#2 | 33 days ago

bmcannon1 (+)

#13 rules.

#3 | 33 days ago

Raj1869 (+)

Dog never hate our watching sports on TV.

This

#4 | 33 days ago

CRAZY_LADY (+)

yeah but can a dog cook !!!!!

Other/Comment

#5 | 33 days ago

Wordsmith (+)

(Edited by Wordsmith)
CRAZY_LADY wrote:

yeah but can a dog cook !!!!!

My dog can!

And she makes a mean Hamburger Helper!

By the way, Anyone seen the neighbor's cat?

That

#6 | 33 days ago

18packabs (+)

The DOG Listens.......

and wears NO shoes and has no credit cards

This

#7 | 33 days ago

Michael G (+)

(Edited by Michael G)
WHY BEER IS BETTER THAN A WOMAN

1. Frigid beer is good beer

2. Beer never gets a headache

3. You can share a beer with your friends

4. You don't have to wine and dine beer

5. Beer goes down easily

6. You can enjoy beer every day of the month

7. You can have more then one beer and not feel guilty

8. Beer doesn't get jealous when you grab another beer

9. A beer will listen

10. Beer doesn't spend all your money

(there are others but the COC dictates I don't list them...)

Other/Comment

#8 | 33 days ago

mojorisin188 (+)

CRAZY_LADY wrote:

yeah but can a dog cook !!!!!

does this answer your question?

#9 | 33 days ago

mojorisin188 (+)

(Edited by mojorisin188)
Wordsmith wrote:

My dog can!

And she makes a mean Hamburger Helper!

By the way, Anyone seen the neighbor's cat?

you beat me to it Alan.

#10 | 33 days ago

yruwet2 (+)

A dog smells your farts, and doesn't leave the room!!

That

#11 | 33 days ago

mojorisin188 (+)

yruwet2 wrote:

A dog smells your farts, and doesn't leave the room!!

No. but if I smell my mom's dog's farts... you better leave the room... we call them "Blue Bangers" they are B-A-D!

#12 | 33 days ago

Cali_Kat (+)

Den-ace wrote:

I think you covered all the bases! The studded collar one #11 was my favorite though!

Hmmm....I don't have a problem with a studded collar. LOL!!

#13 | 33 days ago

CRAZY_LADY (+)

cause i do not like burt fur

Other/Comment

#14 | 33 days ago

cajunbuckeye (+)

have we come this far in evolution that we would choose a wet,cold nosed,nail scracthing smelly dog to that of a nice soft skinned ,sweet smelling lady to crawl up in my lap seems ludicris to me but then again i have both of the things i just explained,,,,,as long as the kitty litterbox is cleaned and the dog is bathed all is good in my universe. i can have both of those things cause a women can do some things that even Ceasar the dog whisperer couldnt train a dog to do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#15 | 33 days ago

alainpeartree (+)

cajunbuckeye wrote:

im with you on that one capt'n

This

#16 | 33 days ago

LJHeath73 (+)

There's one missing from this list...

It is easier for men to talk to a dog than to keep up with intelligent conversation!

(I feel the PQ's coming for this one...)

This

#17 | 33 days ago

REMMIN (+)

mojorisin188 wrote:

No. but if I smell my mom's dog's farts... you better leave the room... we call them "Blue Bangers" they are B-A-D!

I have a cane corso, I got him 1 month before I got married. All I got to say is that after 9 years me and my dog are still together. He is loyal and a good listener...he is liad back and and not a nagger....he enjoy the out doors and bar b que. the wife wasn"t an animal lover anyway. I HAVE BEEN DIVORCE SINCE JAN 2009. MAN I ENJOY IT SO MUCH :) I WOULD DO IT AGAIN BUT IN ABOUT 5-10 YEARS. SHE WILL NEED TO BE A DOG LOVER AND LOVE LIFE!

#18 | 33 days ago

JRSFLAME88 (+)

Is it just a coincidence how much a man and a dog have in common?

This

#19 | 33 days ago

wyldePHX (+)

Dogs don't care if you use their shampoo

Dog's time in the bathroom is confined to just a quick drink

Dogs are excited by rough play

Dogs appreciate excessive body hair

A dog's disposition stays the same all month long.

Dogs understand that instincts are better than
asking for directions.

It’s legal to keep a dog chained up at your house.

Dogs like to do their snooping outside as
opposed to in your wallet, desk and the
back of your underwear drawer.

Dogs would rather have you buy them a hamburger
dinner than a lobster one.

Dogs enjoy heavy petting in public.

#20 | 33 days ago

Daniel_and_Becca (+)

That to funny i really like this poll lol

This

#21 | 33 days ago

wyldePHX (+)

My partner caught me posting that one, so now I have to post one about why "Dogs are better than Men"
(my dog wouldn't have cared if it caught me )

Dogs are willing to sleep on a rug and fetch on command

Dogs spend less time worrying about hair loss

Dogs are willing to eat anything you put on their plate and will always want more

Dogs are willing to hold your purse in public

Dogs expect to go outside on leashes... men think they can do everything on their own

Unlikely to roll over and lose consciousness immediately following intense play

You can train a dog.

The worst social disease you can get from dogs is fleas.
(OK. The *really* worst disease you can get from them is rabies, but there's a vaccine for it, and you get to kill the one that gives it to you.)

...Unfortunately, some of these are true in my case.

#22 | 33 days ago

acegresh (+)

LJHeath73 wrote:

There's one missing from this list...

It is easier for men to talk to a dog than to keep up with intelligent conversation!

(I feel the PQ's coming for this one...)

Oh hell no you didn't! It's not that your conversations are all that intelligent, they're boring and full of useless gossip. Who cares what celebrity is pregnant, or getting married/divorced. Then there are the "I'm so fat" conversations. Listening to womens' conversations make me want to suck start my shotgun sometimes! That's the kind of stuff I have to deal with in my house.

#23 | 33 days ago

LJHeath73 (+)

acegresh wrote:

Maybe in YOUR house.... but speak for yourself!

If you heard me talking to my friends, you'd hear us chatting it up over things like sports, current events, our children's education, domestic responsibilities... oh wait.... am I going too fast for you???

This

#24 | 33 days ago

marcus_nyce (+)

There's a underlying "B*tch" play on words that should in this thread but I'm just going to go ahead and pass at this time. (Wait, I kinda did it anyway. D'oh!)

This

#25 | 33 days ago

ankurnathmishra (+)

I thought women loved their dogs more than their men.

Other/Comment

#26 | 33 days ago

acegresh (+)

LJHeath73 wrote:

Haha very funny. I am talking about the women that are around my house. They sound like a bunch of hens clucking about useless gossip junk. I just wish I had some women that would talk about sports and stuff like that.

#27 | 33 days ago

blondie45044 (+)

Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes.
Q: What is it when a man talks nasty to a woman?
A: Sexual harassment.

Q: What is it when a woman talks nasty to a man?
A: $3.99 a minute.

Other/Comment

#28 | 33 days ago

Indydave (+)

Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 pounds.

#29 | 33 days ago

Irish22 (+)

Indydave wrote:

Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 pounds.

How can you tell your girlfriend is getting fat?

She can fit into your wife's clothes!

Wanna find out who loves you more? Lock your dog and wife/girlfriend in the trunk of your car, after 30 minutes open the trunk and see which one is happy to see you.

This

#30 | 33 days ago

janet011685 (+)

To be fair, not only men prefer dogs sometimes.
My dog loves me no matter what. She doesn't hold grudges, she's loyal, and protective. If I have a bad day, she sits next to me, silently, and just nuzzles me until I feel better. If I step on her tail and hurt her, I kiss her nose, say "I'm sorry" and all is forgiven (and she won't bring it up 5 years later in an argument). When I get home, she's always happy to see me and jumps up and licks my face (although I guess you CAN teach a man to do that too

). She doesn't care if I gain a few pounds, how much money I make, or if I wear makeup and heels or just sweats. She enjoys the simple things in life (a long walk, cuddling on the couch, rolling around in the grass, etc.), and I NEVER need a leash to make sure she doesn't stray.

#31 | 33 days ago

cuddles127017 (+)

To each their own. If it's a dog that makes your day and not a woman then more power to you.

Other/Comment

#32 | 33 days ago

rileyjames47 (+)

I prefer to think why Women have dogs instead of husbands. Some great Dog Pics Kim.

#33 | 33 days ago

streetballer123 (+)

Personally, Id rather have a wife

#34 | 33 days ago

fasterhurry (+)

I go with cuddles whatever rocks your boat.

This

#35 | 33 days ago

kammi42 (+)

From the comments it looks like maybe some of you havent met the right woman/women

#36 | 33 days ago

I_Bleed_Purple (+)

18packabs wrote:

The DOG Listens.......

and wears NO shoes and has no credit cards

Can I smart and funny this one, like 20 times each?

Other/Comment

#37 | 33 days ago

DERYKE (+)

No matters what happens in life a dog will be with by your side.Good times bad rich or poor etc.And will always be happy come when called set when asked .THE BEST IS THEY ARE QUITE WHEN ASKED ALSO.;DOGS DO NOT P..M..S... ALSO ...............PEACE AND QUITE???? THAT COULD EXPLAIN THE REASON FOR MY DIVORCES

This

#38 | 33 days ago

kammi42 (+)

Whatever you give a woman she will make greater.

If you give her sperm she will give You a baby.
If you give her a house she will give You a home.
If you give her groceries she will give You a meal.
If you give her a smile she will give You her heart.

.

#39 | 33 days ago

I_Bleed_Purple (+)

kammi42 wrote:

If only life were really that simple.......

Other/Comment

#40 | 33 days ago

VIOLET (+)

Maybe men should give a second thought....

#41 | 33 days ago

KitNKaboodle (+)

Good one Vi ... I like the Boxer ...

#42 | 33 days ago

sherribaby88 (+)

KitNKaboodle wrote:

Good one Vi ... I like the Boxer ...

LOL.....

The classifieds

         yes,that was great... i like the golden retreiver!...

Hey Kit... just had to add this one lol... i loved the dog posts.. i have one of them here, but had to delete a few, as they were not dogs.. lol

These classifieds were really put in the paper – a smile for your day:

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 years old. Hateful little bastard. Bites!

FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog.

FREE PUPPIES.. Mother, AKC German Shepherd. Father, Super Dog...able to leap tall fences in a single bound.

FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG . Looks like a rat . Been out a while. Better be a big reward.

COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED. Also 1 gay bull for sale.

#43 | 32 days ago

anduaugust (+)

dogs
may be they are not jealous of competitions
and they have no objection against ur girlfriends

This

#44 | 32 days ago

WISAC1 (+)

Wordsmith wrote:

My dog can!

And she makes a mean Hamburger Helper!

By the way, Anyone seen the neighbor's cat?

i wondered where the cat disappeared to.

#45 | 32 days ago

rogercarver1960 (+)

When a dog's hungry, open up a can, put it in a bowl, and put it on the floor. When your wife gets hungry, you have to get dressed up and go to an all-you-can eat buffet that you can't afford....and it happens to be when the football game enters the 4th quarter!!!

This

#46 | 32 days ago

baby-blue15 (+)

They never asked does my bum like big in this
or get up early to put their face on in the morning

#47 | 32 days ago

Dream_Machine (+)

Oooohhh Hot Doggy, We Have A Winner.

Other/Comment

#48 | 22 days ago

s143 (+)

because dogs are trusty they dont leave us till death & wifes there is no guarantee when they leave .......

#49 | 3 days ago

Dubs (+)

blondie45044 wrote:

Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes.
Q: What is it when a man talks nasty to a woman?
A: Sexual harassment.

Q: What is it when a woman talks nasty to a man?
A: $3.99 a minute.

LMAO!!

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