FanIQ

You Might Like

Asked By: Chief_aka_James

Who liked it? 9

... and 9 other fans

Skip to Next Poll »

Deep Thoughts.

Thanks to kobe_lova's "Write much?" poll, it got me thinking about one of the things I love to write about most. Deep Thoughts. They used to be one of my favorite sections of Saturday Night Live way back when, and I own a book or two from Jack Handey (author/"creator") and really have enjoyed making my own. I honestly have near thousands on my computer, and certainly love creating more and more.

This is a poll for those of you that can come up with your own Deep Thoughts, or just leave feedback on the creators of their own here.

| Closed on 02/04/10 at 05:00PM
FanIQ Pts? No | Locker Room | Multiple Choice Opinion Poll

27 Fans
33%	a. I can think of a few of my own
30%	b. I won't make any, but I'll definitely be reading
4%	c. I hate everything about Deep Thoughts
33%	d. Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)

	&nbp;
TOP COMMENT
#1 \| 1266 days ago Chief_aka_James (+)	(Edited by Chief_aka_James) I'll get the ball rolling with just a few I made recently, but won't break this poll with the largest comment ever. • If you’re under water, can time still fly? Or does it just swim really fast? • I had a window of opportunity but it was too bright so I shut the blinds. • I once killed 12 birds with one stone. It was a pretty big stone. • If we are what we eat, does that mean cannibals are more human than the rest of us? • If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. And if you can’t join ‘em, do you really think you ever had a chance at beating them in the first place? • I tried to catch the tooth fairy when I was a kid by placing a mouse trap under my pillow, and it would have worked too if my stupid dad hadn’t set it off on his finger in the middle of the night. I never did forgive him for that. • I’ve put a lot of thought into it, but for the life of me I can only come up with one way to skin a cat. • Whoever came up with the saying “like taking candy from a baby” probably never tried giving candy to a baby. It's just as easy, possibly easier. • I think it’s about time Jack started to think outside the box. • Where can one go to train to become a seeing-eye-human for blind dogs? • I never tell anyone to take a chill pill anymore after hearing about that poor girl who overdosed on them and died. Tragic. • I thought that if I didn’t wear green on St. Patrick ’s Day, lots of beautiful women would pinch me. Turns out only sweaty old men do the pinching. • I shoot the messenger. • Pinocchio found guilty of identity theft. When questioned, the “real boy” had no comment. • I was going to make a pie, but I was out of scratch so I had to go to the store. • If I had a nickel for every time I had a nickel, I would have a lot of nickels. • I think a good idea would be to dress up in clothing from different time periods and go around asking people what year it was, as if you just got out of a time machine. • I tried reading between the lines once but it was just a lot of blank, white space. So I drew a picture instead. • I only became a heroin addict because that’s what Mr. Jones did, and I was just trying to keep up with him and his family. • When you see the fallen branch lying on the road take a left. Go down that road until your arms begin to get tired, and then take a right. My house is the one with the flag up on the mailbox. If you see an old lady crossing the street, you’ve gone too far. • I never saw my refrigerator as being physically attractive before, but my chick magnet never lies. • So if man’s best friend is a dog, and diamonds are a girl’s best friend, what do I tell my wife if my best friend ate her best friend? Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
	9 Was this comment...?


36 Comments \| Sorted by Most Recent First \| Red = You Disagreed
Vote for your favorite comments. Fans decide the Top Comment (3+ votes) and also hide poor quality comments (4+ votes).
#1 \| 1266 days ago Chief_aka_James (+)	(Edited by Chief_aka_James) I'll get the ball rolling with just a few I made recently, but won't break this poll with the largest comment ever. • If you’re under water, can time still fly? Or does it just swim really fast? • I had a window of opportunity but it was too bright so I shut the blinds. • I once killed 12 birds with one stone. It was a pretty big stone. • If we are what we eat, does that mean cannibals are more human than the rest of us? • If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. And if you can’t join ‘em, do you really think you ever had a chance at beating them in the first place? • I tried to catch the tooth fairy when I was a kid by placing a mouse trap under my pillow, and it would have worked too if my stupid dad hadn’t set it off on his finger in the middle of the night. I never did forgive him for that. • I’ve put a lot of thought into it, but for the life of me I can only come up with one way to skin a cat. • Whoever came up with the saying “like taking candy from a baby” probably never tried giving candy to a baby. It's just as easy, possibly easier. • I think it’s about time Jack started to think outside the box. • Where can one go to train to become a seeing-eye-human for blind dogs? • I never tell anyone to take a chill pill anymore after hearing about that poor girl who overdosed on them and died. Tragic. • I thought that if I didn’t wear green on St. Patrick ’s Day, lots of beautiful women would pinch me. Turns out only sweaty old men do the pinching. • I shoot the messenger. • Pinocchio found guilty of identity theft. When questioned, the “real boy” had no comment. • I was going to make a pie, but I was out of scratch so I had to go to the store. • If I had a nickel for every time I had a nickel, I would have a lot of nickels. • I think a good idea would be to dress up in clothing from different time periods and go around asking people what year it was, as if you just got out of a time machine. • I tried reading between the lines once but it was just a lot of blank, white space. So I drew a picture instead. • I only became a heroin addict because that’s what Mr. Jones did, and I was just trying to keep up with him and his family. • When you see the fallen branch lying on the road take a left. Go down that road until your arms begin to get tired, and then take a right. My house is the one with the flag up on the mailbox. If you see an old lady crossing the street, you’ve gone too far. • I never saw my refrigerator as being physically attractive before, but my chick magnet never lies. • So if man’s best friend is a dog, and diamonds are a girl’s best friend, what do I tell my wife if my best friend ate her best friend? Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
	9 Was this comment...?
#2 \| 1266 days ago CAPTAINSEAFOOD (+)	omg,this way to deep for my shallow mind ,god bless all of our troops and god bless all my fellow iquers I won't make any, but I'll definitely be reading
	Was this comment...?
#3 \| 1266 days ago hockey54 (+)	If you go flying back through time and you see somebody else flying forward into the future, it`s probably best to avoid eye contact. J.H.
	Was this comment...?
#4 \| 1266 days ago Kenne (+)	I posted one of his Deep Thoughts in a poll about parenting once and got 6 or 7 PQs for it. I guess the others didn't find it too funny.
	1 Was this comment...?
#5 \| 1266 days ago Chief_aka_James (+)	Kenne wrote: I posted one of his Deep Thoughts in a poll about parenting once and got 6 or 7 PQs for it. I guess the others didn't find it too funny. Some people just don't appreciate good comedy Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
	Was this comment...?
#6 \| 1266 days ago hockey54 (+)	I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picyure us attacking that world because they`d never expect it. J.H. Broken promises don`t upset me. I just think, why did they believe me? J.H...he was one warped f***! LMBO
	1 Was this comment...?
#7 \| 1266 days ago Chief_aka_James (+)	• I think they should make a comic book about a guy who is exposed to radioactive waste and as a result dies a horrible, agonizing death. That way, kids won’t get the wrong idea that all radioactive waste gives you superpowers. • There was a kid in my class whom everybody called ‘four eyes’. Finally one day he got so fed up with it, he went out and got a pair of glasses. ‘Eight eyes’ just doesn’t have the same ring to it. • I don’t know why we call them flying squirrels, it’s a very misleading name. Instead, we should call them flying furry nut-eaters. • I like to send off my own messages in a bottle, because I bet those people stranded on an island somewhere would like to read some mail for a change. • Don’t get me wrong, I love going to 3-D movies as much as the next guy, but what I don’t like are those flimsy glasses they give you. I, for one, would rather pay a little more for a good pair that you can wear around, because you never know when something might pop out at you. • I bet it’d make you really mad if you were an astronaut heading to the moon and when out of nowhere, another spaceship passes you. And then to make matters worse, they merge in front of you without using their blinker. Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
	1 Was this comment...?
#8 \| 1266 days ago cuddles127017 (+)	Way too deep for me. lol Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
	Was this comment...?
#9 \| 1266 days ago Chief_aka_James (+)	LOL, well, it certainly didn't help you replying to that post. And yes, 22 out of 700+ is a few. The blaming yourself one is a good one. Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
	Was this comment...?
#10 \| 1266 days ago jasonwrites (+)	Time flies. I can't, they're too fast. I can think of a few of my own
	1 Was this comment...?
#11 \| 1266 days ago Kmacnealy1 (+)	why do they call it a calculator? I need the answer now. Shouldn't it be called a calcunow? I can think of a few of my own
	Was this comment...?
#12 \| 1266 days ago ankurnathmishra (+)	Practice makes you perfect but nobody's perfect so why Practice.
	1 Was this comment...?
#13 \| 1266 days ago truckdriverpat (+)	I never met a man that I wouldn't kill- Don't ask me if the rage is real- I can see inside you....it's gross and, so sick- Genocide from the other side, and you can suck my d**K- Society loses the feel,the simple use of common sense- Families across the country struggle to pay the rent - The truth is ugly, cutting to the bone- If you argue with Pat on the Q, they will see you are gone- I wanna be a star - Unlike Tiger I can drive a car- The cut from the blade, right through your bone- I wait for you to die then use your Cell Phone-
	1 Was this comment...?
#14 \| 1266 days ago JRSFLAME88 (+)	What's with the people who put carpeting on the lid of their toilet seat? What are they thinking -- "Gosh, if we have a party there may not be enough standing room; I'd better carpet the toilet too." Have you ever noticed that the waiter who takes your order is not the one who brings your food anymore? What is THAT about? And which waiter are you tipping, anyway? I think next time I go to a restaurant I'll just say, "Oh, sorry, I only eat the food. The guy who pays the bill will be along shortly." Would somebody please explain to me those signs that say, "No animals allowed except for Seeing Eye Dogs?" Who is that sign for? Is it for the dog, or the blind person? Why do people give each other flowers? To celebrate various important occasions, they're killing living creatures? Why restrict it to plants? "Sweetheart, let's make up. Have this deceased squirrel." Can't we just get rid of wine lists? Do we really have to be reminded every time we go out to a nice restaurant that we have no idea what we are doing? Why don't they just give us a trigonometry quiz with the menu? Why do they call it a "building"? It looks like they're finished. Why isn't it a "built"? Why is it when you turn on the TV you see ads for telephone companies, and when you turn on the radio you hear ads for TV shows, and when you get put on hold on the phone you hear a radio station? Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking space but okay to go the bathroom in a handicapped stall? How come you have to pay someone to rotate your tires? Isn't that the basic idea behind the wheel? Don't they rotate on their own? Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
	3 Was this comment...?
#15 \| 1266 days ago noti4 (+)	THE MAN IS AN ANIMAL THE FLY IS AN ANIMAL, WELL, THE MAN IS A FLY THE LIFE IS LIKE A ONION, WHE MUST PEEL SHE CRYING IF I AM A WOMAN,I AM NOT A MAN AND IN ITALIAN MANGIA BENNE,CACCA FORTE E RIDETE DE LA MORTE I can think of a few of my own
	1 Was this comment...?
#16 \| 1266 days ago janet011685 (+)	Kenne wrote: I posted one of his Deep Thoughts in a poll about parenting once and got 6 or 7 PQs for it. I guess the others didn't find it too funny. I used to use them as my "Thought of the Day". "I think a good way to keep mosquitoes away from you on a summer day is to hang a big bag of blood on your porch."
	2 Was this comment...?
#17 \| 1266 days ago Chief_aka_James (+)	• I always like it when things just click, so naturally my best friend is a seat belt. • You know you’re in hell when you’re the one who has to fix it every time it breaks loose. • When the s*** finally hits the fan, one needs to seriously consider installing air conditioning. • When worse comes to worse, my prediction finally came true. • After years of searching, I’ve finally figured out the secret to true happiness, but don’t worry, I’m really good at keeping secrets. • There’s a lot of good competition, but this pastry thief takes the cake! • I’ve been drinking beer every since I learned to walk. I’m a really slow learner. • Nobody in their right mind could dislike bubbles, but somebody in their left mind might. • Whether you like it or not, you’re gonna like it. • If you want me to host this party instead of you, then by all means, be my guest. • I was running home when all of a sudden I turned on a dime, so I bent over, picked up the small coin and put it in my pocket with the rest of my change. • When you’re standing on the shoulders of giants, keep in mind that 1 in 4 giants have really bad dandruff. Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
	1 Was this comment...?
#18 \| 1266 days ago rsteven45 (+)	(Edited by rsteven45) If you drunk dial someone who is also drunk, is it really a drunk dial?
	Was this comment...?
#19 \| 1266 days ago blondie45044 (+)	Well. I won't make any, but I'll definitely be reading
	Was this comment...?
#20 \| 1266 days ago icfeet (+)	Just remember...wherever you go...THERE YOU ARE I can think of a few of my own
	Was this comment...?
#21 \| 1266 days ago icfeet (+)	Why do we park in driveways and drive on parkways? I can think of a few of my own
	1 Was this comment...?
#22 \| 1266 days ago icfeet (+)	If 7-11 is open 24 hrs/day, 365 days per year....WHY is there a lock on the front door? I can think of a few of my own
	Was this comment...?
#23 \| 1266 days ago icfeet (+)	If you take the wings off of a fly...does it then become a WALK??? I can think of a few of my own
	1 Was this comment...?
#24 \| 1265 days ago Chief_aka_James (+)	• I think we should end our dependency on fossil fuels because I have too much respect for dinosaurs to defile their remains for our selfish energy needs. • I was having a hard time coming up with an idea so I put on my thinking cap. I don’t know why I call it that really, because it’s only a regular baseball cap with Einstein’s brain sitting on top. • I thought about joining a think tank but I decided I wasn’t really a good fit for the army. • What exactly are smithereens? And is there any other way to get them other than blowing something up? • I think one of the hardest jobs to do for a living would be a door-to-door salesman. Especially if they had you trying to sell doors. • I like to play elevator pranks on people. For instance, I like to press all of the buttons at the same time, that way when people get on they give me really weird looks. Not because of the buttons, but because I’m not wearing any pants. • I try to avoid going to the grocery store hungry because I’m much more likely to buy more food, and then throw that food on the floor and jump around it with my arms raised over my head screaming monkey sounds. • Any man that tells you it’s a good day to die probably isn’t going to die. You are. • I think the rainbow is more of an acquired taste. Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
	Was this comment...?
#25 \| 1265 days ago raja_starkglass (+)	F fun A adult games N naughty I intelligent Q quality often compromised..............................................................for quantity.....?. I won't make any, but I'll definitely be reading
	Was this comment...?
#26 \| 1265 days ago marcus_nyce (+)	Ladies if you don't throw like a girl, we'll think you're a lesbian... but we'd still hit it. Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
	1 Was this comment...? (1)
#27 \| 1265 days ago marcus_nyce (+)	Smoking does does not, and will not, kill you. There are plenty of really old people in Europe. Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
	Was this comment...?
#28 \| 1265 days ago hotice (+)	* I can think of a few of my own,but they are already on others 'book pad' Whenever i find a respectable post,my respects are already exhausted! Whenever You find a beautiful female avatar ,its always belong to a male Your boss is always wrong. Time and Tide wait for you if you can swim well!
	Was this comment...?
#29 \| 1205 days ago JenX63 (+)	JRSFLAME88 wrote: What's with the people who put carpeting on the lid of their toilet seat? What are they thinking -- "Gosh, if we have a party there may not be enough standing room; I'd better carpet the toilet too." Have you ever noticed that the waiter who takes your order is not the one who brings your food anymore? What is THAT about? And which waiter are you tipping, anyway? I think next time I go to a restaurant I'll just say, "Oh, sorry, I only eat the food. The guy who pays the bill will be along shortly." Would somebody please explain to me those signs that say, "No animals allowed except for Seeing Eye Dogs?" Who is that sign for? Is it for the dog, or the blind person? Why do people give each other flowers? To celebrate various important occasions, they're killing living creatures? Why restrict it to plants? "Sweetheart, let's make up. Have this deceased squirrel." Can't we just get rid of wine lists? Do we really have to be reminded every time we go out to a nice restaurant that we have no idea what we are doing? Why don't they just give us a trigonometry quiz with the menu? Why do they call it a "building"? It looks like they're finished. Why isn't it a "built"? Why is it when you turn on the TV you see ads for telephone companies, and when you turn on the radio you hear ads for TV shows, and when you get put on hold on the phone you hear a radio station? Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking space but okay to go the bathroom in a handicapped stall? How come you have to pay someone to rotate your tires? Isn't that the basic idea behind the wheel? Don't they rotate on their own? *ROFLMAO.....# 8 is my favorite.....thanks for the giggles Gina* I won't make any, but I'll definitely be reading
	Was this comment...?
#30 \| 1205 days ago kobe_lova (+)	why i have i never seen this poll... i even got an honorable mention. WTF! i'm here all day...and now it ends in an hour. CRAP! My deep thoughts: Does everything really takes like chicken? Nothing is really like riding a bike. How many people have planned a crime based on what they learned from CSI and Law and Order? You will get more done if 24 hours if you only sleep 3. If you get arrested, are you really guilty until proven innocent? If you are going to tell me that I'm wrong after you ask me a question, WTF did you ask me for? I can think of a few of my own
	Was this comment...?
#31 \| 1205 days ago noti4 (+)	IF YOU CAN SEE INTO YOUR HEARTH, YOU CAN SEE MANY THINGS ABOUT YOU, ARE YOU BRAVE, SEE YOU INSIDE .- I can think of a few of my own
	Was this comment...?
#32 \| 1205 days ago icfeet (+)	Hmmm....what was the best thing BEFORE sliced bread, if something is the best thing SINCE sliced bread... I can think of a few of my own
	Was this comment...?
#33 \| 895 days ago icfeet (+)	marcus_nyce wrote: Ladies if you don't throw like a girl, we'll think you're a lesbian... but we'd still hit it. Why do the Drive-UP ATM's have Braille? I can think of a few of my own
	Was this comment...?
#34 \| 893 days ago janet011685 (+)	icfeet wrote: Why do the Drive-UP ATM's have Braille? Good lord, Kurt ... weekends are dead here and all, but you didn't even give it a chance before reviving yet another old poll.
	2 Was this comment...? (1)
#35 \| 893 days ago Chief_aka_James (+)	janet011685 wrote: Good lord, Kurt ... weekends are dead here and all, but you didn't even give it a chance before reviving yet another old poll. Hey, it was a good poll to revive. Kurt Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
	1 Was this comment...? (1)
#36 \| 893 days ago janet011685 (+)	Chief_aka_James wrote: Hey, it was a good poll to revive. Kurt Psshh, says YOU.
	Was this comment...? (1)

Post a Comment Already a user? Sign in here

Join FanIQ - It's Free

FanIQ is the ultimate free community for sports fans.

•Talk sports with fans from all over - 1,649,417+ Comments

•Track your game picks - 38,670,182,382+ Sports Predictions

•Prove you know sports - 116,275+ Trivia Questions

•Find fans of your teams - 11,453,110+ New Friends

Start here >> Select your favorite teams. It's free.

Polls You Might Like
	Music Storytellers - ELO Asked by Nick__ \| Locker Room, Music \| 1 questions asked Today 0 opinions \| Last by -
	Music Madness: Group 4 (Yeeeee-hawwwww) Asked by Nick__ \| Locker Room, Movies \| 4 questions asked Yesterday 52 opinions \| 8 comments \| Last by Michael G
	Music Madness: Group 11(Lucille) Asked by Nick__ \| Locker Room, Movies \| 4 questions asked Yesterday 52 opinions \| 9 comments \| Last by Michael G
	Music Madness: Group 3D (ROCK ON) Asked by Nick__ \| Locker Room, Music \| 4 questions asked Yesterday 52 opinions \| 2 comments \| Last by Michael G
	Music Madness: Group 9 (YO) Asked by Nick__ \| Locker Room, Music \| 4 questions asked Yesterday 56 opinions \| 4 comments \| Last by Michael G

Answer Breakdown

Answers are sorted in reverse chronological order

#	Name	FanIQ	Answer (Red= You Disagreed)
27	kobe_lova 02/04/2010 03:09PM		I can think of a few of my own
26	JenX63 02/04/2010 02:38PM		I won't make any, but I'll definitely be reading
25	Jahiegel 02/01/2010 02:33PM		Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
24	G Money 01/15/2010 02:38AM		I won't make any, but I'll definitely be reading
23	qtowndogg 12/14/2009 10:29AM		I can think of a few of my own
22	sports_schmorts 12/06/2009 05:40PM		I won't make any, but I'll definitely be reading
21	towsongirl12 12/06/2009 03:19AM		Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
20	raja_starkglass 12/06/2009 03:13AM		I won't make any, but I'll definitely be reading
19	icfeet 12/05/2009 09:29PM		I can think of a few of my own
18	blondie45044 12/05/2009 09:17PM		I won't make any, but I'll definitely be reading
17	nader2009 12/05/2009 07:12PM		I can think of a few of my own
16	marcus_nyce 12/05/2009 06:08PM		Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
15	sc0ttm0 12/05/2009 05:36PM		I can think of a few of my own
14	JRSFLAME88 12/05/2009 03:51PM		Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
13	noti4 12/05/2009 03:50PM		I can think of a few of my own
12	Cali_Kat 12/05/2009 03:38PM		Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
11	jasonwrites 12/05/2009 02:44PM		I can think of a few of my own
10	18packabs 12/05/2009 02:41PM		Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
9	WISAC1 12/05/2009 02:23PM		I can think of a few of my own
8	Kmacnealy1 12/05/2009 01:01PM		I can think of a few of my own
7	kteacher 12/05/2009 12:49PM		Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
6	Seth 12/05/2009 12:14PM		I won't make any, but I'll definitely be reading
5	cuddles127017 12/05/2009 11:49AM		Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)
4	CAPTAINSEAFOOD 12/05/2009 10:22AM		I won't make any, but I'll definitely be reading
3	juliemarie_84 12/05/2009 10:18AM		I won't make any, but I'll definitely be reading
2	The_Real_Stoney 12/05/2009 09:30AM		I hate everything about Deep Thoughts
1	Chief_aka_James 12/05/2009 09:28AM		Cecil (Because I want to be different, yet still socially accepted)